chavisory's post-it notes: Archive

I don't remember why I have tie-line in my nightstand drawer.

#stagemanagerproblems

Mar 31, 2012

Mar 31, 2012226 notes

Mar 31, 20121,893 notes

Mar 31, 201210,434 notes

ponywithafez:

Why are most autism awareness materials (websites, shirts, graphics in general) in horribly bright, painfully conflicting colors?

Red, blue, and yellow all in the same place makes my eyes bleed (I’m looking at you, puzzle piece ribbon).

Fucking this.

I always find it…

Once upon a time I was skimming through pages on Sensory Processing Disorder, and I came upon one with a neon flashing sidebar of advertisements. I was like “I think you’re unclear on the concept here.”

Mar 31, 201210 notes

Mar 31, 2012153 notes

Mar 31, 2012584 notes

Mar 30, 20121,138 notes

Mar 30, 2012245 notes

How do you treat things you hate?

To parents who still think it’s okay to say “I hate autism,”

First read this, if you haven’t: http://mamabegood.blogspot.com/2012/03/you-cant-hate-autism-and-accept-it.html

Okay, now knowing what autistic adults tend to say about how hurtful your statement of hate is to people like us…people like your children…I’m at a loss as to how to understand your continued insistence on using this phraseology.

(Isn’t empathy something that non-autistic people widely claim to have?)

If somebody hates something, some trait, some condition of being, and then they see it in another person, how do you believe they will then treat that person? Why would you think your child will be immune?

How will people treat your child when they see autism in your child, if they hate autism?

How do people treat things they hate? How do you? With patience, compassion, respect, or kindness? How do you expect people to treat expressions of your child’s autism—and by extension, your child—if they hate autism?

You say you don’t see it as part of your child, as part of who he or she is, just something that gets in his way?

How does he see it? What is it to him?

You don’t know because he can’t communicate it? Then how can you presume what he thinks or feels about it? Because of his communication difficulties, your opinion of his life counts more?

What if, to him, it is just how he is?…..And you hate it.

What’s the truest thing about yourself, the truest thing about how you function in the world?

What do you feel if someone says to you, “But that’s not really you. That’s just something that gets in your way?”

Or “But you’re so much more than that?”

Your child might not conceive of his autism as that intrinsic to who he is. Not everyone does; he’s entitled to his own opinion. But a lot of us do. He might. He might not yet. He might never. But he really might someday.

And then, if you’ve been saying for his entire life that you hate it? Then you have been telling him all along that you hate who he is.

Is that really, really a risk worth taking? Just to feel like you have a right to vent your deep dark feelings without regard for who you hurt? Is it really? Do you hate autism that much, that to put your child’s self-worth on the line like that is worth it?

And will you one day be proud to explain to your child that your presumed right to say these things was more important to you than his or her sense of self-worth, acceptance, and safety in the world?

goldenheartedrose:

tide-and-wave:

goldenheartedrose:

tide-and-wave:

Am I the only one who thinks that Beetee is autistic? Like I keep on picturing him that way. Anyone else?

No idea, but I think Wiress definitely is. Beetee is a maybe for autistic traits.

Now that you…

I have lots of feelings about Wiress. :)

I read both Wiress and Beetee as autistic, and I could make an argument for Rue as well.

Mar 30, 201215 notes

“When, as happened recently in France, an attempt is made to coerce women out of the burqa rather than creating a situation in which a woman can choose what she wishes to do, it’s not about liberating her, but about unclothing her. It becomes an act of humiliation and cultural imperialism. It’s not about the burqa. It’s about the coercion. Coercing a woman out of a burqa is as bad as coercing her into one. Viewing gender in this way, shorn of social, political and economic context, makes it an issue of identity, a battle of props and costumes. It is what allowed the US government to use western feminist groups as moral cover when it invaded Afghanistan in 2001. Afghan women were (and are) in terrible trouble under the Taliban. But dropping daisy-cutters on them was not going to solve their problems.” —

Arundhati Roy (via grrrlstudies)

(via femmemirage)

Mar 30, 20125,192 notes

Mar 30, 20121,882 notes

Mar 30, 20127,187 notes

world-shaker:

I know where I’ll be watching movies from now on.

AMC Theaters, however, is making an exception for the documentary Bully, which the Weinstein Company announced yesterday would be released this Friday unrated after the MPAA refused to lower its R rating for the film. Today, AMC decided it would allow ticket buyers under the age of 17 to see Bully — with permission. “AMC will be presenting Bully…as not rated,” said the theater-chain in a statement. “Guests younger than 17 can see the film if they are accompanied by a parent or adult guardian, or if they present a signed parental permission slip.”

That permission slip will be available on Wednesday at this link on AMC’s website. The film opens at the AMC Lincoln Square 13 in New York, and the AMC Century City 15 in Los Angeles on Friday, and expands into other theaters nationwide over the coming weeks. (A rep for the company declined to comment on the Parent’s Television Council’s statement that screening Bully at AMC’s theaters “threatens to derail the entire ratings system.”)

YES! Derail the entire ratings system!

Mar 29, 2012170 notes

so.

I’m trying to figure out how I can do “professional dress” (the standards of which, for women, are like WOAH) for my internship this summer, given my bad brains/general fail. Like, I can’t do anything super complicated (and even some of these “5 minute hairstyles” seem FUCKcomplicated to me)…

Okay, here are some of the ways I cope for when I have to look “professional,” which is really…I always feel like a non-Muggle pulling off some kind of optical illusion. But people mostly fall for it.

That said, without knowing where your internship is…some professions’ dress standards for women are much more unreasonable than others.’ I’m fairly fortunate in that the place where I mostly have to dress up for…is an arts school, so they’re quite a bit more tolerant of dressing “up,” but comfortably.

I found a really great pair of orthopedic black leather chunky-heeled shoes.

Very plain black circle skirt (found it at Express several years ago) and black tights, which don’t really wrinkle or show dirt. I also have a neat black, long, silk crepe paneled skirt, which rarely needs maintenance.

Over that, I can put just about anything: a colored sweater that’s well-fitted, button-up shirt with half-length sleeves, or even…tonight I’m wearing a bright green t-shirt with a frilly silk collar.

Almost all of my dress shirts and sweaters have a v-neck…not low enough to show any cleavage, but cut well below my collar bones. Just under my collar bones is the absolute highest I can stand anything around my neck. I love half-length or three-quarter sleeves, which both look neat and irritate me less than traditional buttoned sleeves.

I never wear makeup. Lip gloss at absolute most. No one’s ever complained. I don’t so much do my hair; I just brush it and clip it back from my face. (I do have some scarring on my face, but it’s fairly light.)

But really…I’m in the profession I’m in, in no small part because I just can’t deal with the dress codes for women in some others. At some point when I was a kid, I was crying about having to wear a pair of panty hose, and my dad started lecturing about needing to learn how to dress if I was ever going to “get a job.”

In my head I went “that just means I won’t be able to have that kind of a job.”

And so most days…I go to “work” in my boots, jeans, and hoodie.

I feel appropriately fortunate about this.

Mar 29, 20129 notes

Abed and Sherlock are my favorite TV aspies

sherlocksflataffect:

ponywithafez:

Anyone know of any female TV aspies?

My favorites too.

Early seasons of Bones, the titular character read as autistic (and obviously, ohmigod so did Zach). But I can’t think of any others off hand =(

Alt-Astrid on Fringe. (Also both universes’ Walter Bishops, to my reading.)

Mar 28, 201210 notes

Totally the best comment ever caught in my main blog's spam trap

I really similar when you plow this type of meaninglessness wrong your posts. Perhaps could you maintain this?

Mar 28, 20122 notes

Mar 28, 2012115 notes

Mar 28, 20121,631 notes

Mar 28, 2012974 notes

littlemissmutant:

for parents discussing whether it’s ok to hate autism.

It would include the following squares:
-“It’s okay to hate autism because it’s ok to hate CANCER!”
-“You can’t judge me because you haven’t walked in my shoes.”
-“But this is my FEELING and my FEELING is valid.”
-“As long as I don’t utter…

Oh wow, I haven’t even read the post yet; I haven’t even read the comments yet, and yet I think I already wrote my response last night….

Mar 28, 201219 notes

Mar 27, 201286 notes

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” —Henri J.M. Nouwen (via julie911) (via quote-book) (via mykindafairytalee) (via storybook-magic) (via mykindafairytalee)

Mar 27, 20121,753 notes

paisleytie:

From an article about a university program for autistic students:

If they don’t learn social skills, most people with autism flounder, according to a study the state Department of Public Welfare released Thursday. It found more than two-thirds of adults with autism are unemployed, and just 6…

This is among my hugest pet peeves—that people assume that our underemployment is due to our social ignorance, rather than from a certain quality of social fluency being physically impossible to carry out, on top of things like multitasking issues and sensory issues and coworkers and supervisors misinterpreting and misconstruing our best efforts. It’s that so often every workplace factor that is completely extraneous to the actual job is held against us.

Mar 27, 20128 notes

“No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away…” —

Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man (via -bookworm)

And even then if that were possible. They always had existed so they always exist. But then my relationship to time is pretty strange.

(via youneedacat)

Mar 27, 201227 notes

Mar 27, 20127 notes

Mar 27, 20121,794 notes

“The point is that we could afford any of the things we are told we cannot afford. We simply choose not to. Candidates who say “America cannot afford…” mean “This is not on my list of priorities.” The history of this country, particularly throughout the Depression and Second World War, have proven that we can “afford” essentially anything we want. The question is, are we willing to make the necessary sacrifices? For the military and for corporate largesse, yes. The opportunity costs of those priorities are immense. For anything else, therefore, the answer is no. We say we can’t afford them because that sounds prettier than the truth, which is that they simply aren’t important to us.” —ginandtacos.com » Blog Archive » THE POSSIBLE (via notemily)

Mar 27, 201217 notes

“One of my responsibilities as Commander in Chief is to keep an eye on robots. And I’m pleased to report that the robots you manufacture here seem peaceful. At least for now.” —

President Obama talking to the National Robotics Engineering Center at Carnegie Mellon. (via juliasegal)

This man. Don’t ever change.

(via justanotherwannabeclassic)

Thank you, Mr. President. Thank you.

Mar 26, 20125,821 notes

Mar 26, 20129 notes

Mar 26, 20123,311 notes

Mar 26, 2012235 notes

Mar 26, 2012604 notes

Mar 25, 20121,769 notes

Mar 25, 201271 notes

Mar 25, 20128 notes

paisleytie:

erikais:

I have to find work for this summer, so I’ve been reaching out for help. I emailed my dad and he gave me some good, specific steps that I can do, but then he said this:

“in an effective job search, email is your enemy because it isn’t effective; you have to be comfortable on the phone and not be afraid or procrastinate picking up the phone and calling people.”

Well fuck. It’s not worth trying to explain to him how hard that is for me, and how inherently fucked up it is, and you want to know why autistic folks have such absurdly high unemployment? There’s one of many reasons right there. He would just say something to the effect of “well that’s how the real world is, so tough, you can’t expect people to bend backwards for you”. He can never acknowledge that it’s wrong.

So I’ll do the best I can, and get blamed & shamed if it doesn’t turn out. Sigh.

In response to the bolded: But autistic people, of course, are expected to bend over backwards for non-autistic people. They’re allowed to complain and complain about how haaaard it is to have to give “special treatment” (i.e. accommodations) to us, but the instant we complain about the inequality of the situation, we’re shut down and told we’re being “unreasonable” or “lazy” (but it’s apparently okay to be too lazy to accommodate disabled people. Apparently).

I’m facing a similar situation in that I need to be looking for work this summer, too, and I’m not looking forward to going up against all the ableist obstacles in my way.

I have major phone problems too, but generally, have not come by job opportunities by making cold calls. I agree that e-mail is not effective for job-seeking, either, but that doesn’t make calling around by phone any better.

My advice: just go there in person. If the kind of place you’re looking to get a job is someplace you can just walk into, like a restaurant or retail store, just go. Be dressed well, have your resume, ask to speak to a manager about whether there are any openings available or whether you might fill out an application/leave your resume. A polite and prepared person standing in front of you is so much more compelling than a random phone call that might be answered by god only knows who and promptly forgotten.

Job postings on Craigslist or boards for other specific professions often ask you to e-mail in a resume rather than calling.

I hate the job search process, and it is unnecessarily unfair to autistic people in so many ways…but I think your dad is wrong about the utter necessity of just picking up the phone and making cold calls. I think he’s speaking from another era. In many areas of employment, that is actually not standard anymore, and if you can present yourself well in writing and in person, you can avoid a great deal of it. And you know what? The kinds of jobs that would require you to function that way by phone, are not the jobs for you anyway.

And also, I HATE the “well that’s how the real world is” line. No, the real world is how people make it. It’s not just inevitable that hiring managers look down on people who ask for reasonable accommodations. We all make the world better or worse for each other, and my experience is that people who say this—“that’s just how the real world is”—just don’t want to take responsibility for their own role in how terrible the world is to people, and their ability to do something about it.

Mar 25, 201226 notes

Mar 25, 201286 notes

Mar 25, 2012835 notes

Mar 25, 20121,587 notes

Mar 25, 201219,113 notes

Biscuits

Tonight I made homemade biscuits for the first time. With a rolling pin that was very likely used by my great-grandmother for the same purpose.

Mar 25, 20122 notes

Mar 25, 20122,578 notes

chavisory's post-it notes

April 2012

March 2012